Making inter-species peace at home

In response to a mounting workload and a recent flurry of internet research and writing, I've been having a lot of dreams that I'm blogging or web surfing. Weird, though perhaps not overly so...back when I was a waitress, I had dreams nightmares about that--I'd be working two gigantic sections, often separated by several miles, and I wouldn't be able to find the kitchen. When I was in grad school, I started dreaming about complex communication theories and would wake up murmuring long words, and in spite of the occasional new insight, this generally troubled me as much as the restaurant dreams--I mean, if your mind can't distance yourself from your work while you sleep, how peacefully are you resting? This new work dream seems different, though. I worry that it might be evidence that computer culture is infiltrating the workings of my mind...maybe I've got spyware on the brain (ba dum pum).

Anyway, it happened again this morning, but this time, as I emerged from dreamland, I had some unusually tender feelings for Bitsy, our neurotic feline, who was gently messing my hair from her favorite spot, my pillow (her presence there usually pisses me off) and as I padded down the hall to the bathroom, I remembered why--in my dream, she was helping me find what I was looking for online. In real life, Bitsy is generally a nuisance when it comes to computer work--if she's around, she's trying to get into my lap, or worse yet, onto my desk, between me and my keyboard. But this morning, I really felt like she'd been helping make progress on the subconscious interweb.

Maybe it was because Bitsy has been making some breakthroughs of her own lately. Ever since Miz D, who is allergic to cats, moved into what used to be Mr. Man's office (and Bitsy's private safe spot, complete with baby gate to keep Belle out) she's been getting much braver about spending time in common spaces, and lately, has been trying to get into my lap right in front of Belle and when Belle blocks her, she has been much more aggressive--she'll jump up on a chair and swat at her, mean-like, whereas in the past, she spent most of her time on the stairs (see photo) glaring at the dog and crying for her dad to pick her up and place her safely on the back of the couch.

I should explain that the pets have been a major issue since we moved in together. Mr. Man is very protective of Bitsy (perhaps overly so) and my Belle, though I don't think she would ever hurt Bitsy, is not shy about pursuing her intense curiosity about her new sistercat. We have differing ideas about how to handle this situation, which (a word to the wise) could likely have been avoided if we'd done our research before introducing them, although Bitsy has pretty much hated every other animal she's ever lived with. Mr. Man's therapist even suggested that we get some books about blending step-families, because the situation has caused so many arguments.

Anyhoo, bladder empty, I laid back down beside Mr. Man and told him about my dream. We snuggled for a minute before he had to get up and head off to school. As he generally does, he left the door open so that Belle could hop up and take his place on the bed. I was hoping against hope that Bitsy would maintain her position on the pillow and that Belle would snuggle up on the other side of me, but I didn't really think it was possible.

But they did! No drama whatsoever! I drifted off again, happy, and woke up several hours later (no computer dreams this time) to find them both right where I'd left them, and even when we all got up, there was no hissing, no nothing. Maybe they didn't hear us when we said we weren't celebrating this Hallmark holiday today (though we'll have a date this weekend). Maybe Belle's finally figuring out that Bitsy's not going to take her shit, and Bitsy's realized that Belle's not going to eat her.

Of course, as I write this, I imagine Belle's got Bitsy cornered in the bathroom. Baby steps.